New blog

Going to move to another blog to start afresh! mydailyyrants.blogspot.com this blog will be dead.

Fuck You

Oh so after 15 years of my life, I am being labelled as irresponsible? How wonderful is that. Let me tell you this. I've never been labelled as irresponsible before, before you speak how well do you know do me? I bet you don't cause you are judging me already. Let me tell you, by telling you beforehand is already responsible. I did not inform you last minute. No doubt my attitude was really bad, but I am already being responsible by telling you that I couldn't make it and I got tuition. Which part of english or chinese do you not understand? Need me to speak it what kind of language? Malay? Korean? Japanese? You said I use money to solve the problem or escape from the problem, but the truth is that with money everything can work can. Without money nothing can work out, this is the truth. We are living in singapore for god sake, don't tell me you don't know that singapore is a realistic country. No money no talk, everything around us tells us that. I mean if I have the ability to get a mc or excuse letter then so be it. You got no rights to question me. The doctor allows, unless you tell me that you are better than the doctor in terms or medical condition then you win. And you said that this is what I am suppose to do, but can i ask you what's a student scope of work? It's to study hard, pass exams, get promoted and enter uni/poly/jc. Which part of the workshop is under what I have mention? None, this workshop got nothing to do with any of the above mention. We, the unlucky ones, have to go because the smart school decided to have this stupid workshop and nobody wants to go so you guys are forcing students to go. Am i wrong to say that? Y'all keep complaining that the school got no money, then why the hell are y'all wasting money on stupid things like this. Not only is it stupid, it is also a waste of my precious time. And true enough, if I don't want to do something no one can force me to do it. Cause I am a person with my own principles and mindset. No one can change my thinking, once I've decided that I will do it I will defiantly do it. But if I don't want to do it, taking a gun and pointing at my head won't change the fact, I will still stand firm on my choice. The only reason why I'm going is because I want to show to you that I am a responsible person not like the person you have say. This is me, hate it then fuck off. I don't need to hear someone who doesn't even understands me to lecture me and talk sense into my head. By doing all this, it will only make me hate you and do things that are against your wishes. I don't think that will be an advantage to you cause if matters get big I won't be at the losing end. Cause I know what I'm doing.

Worst results

I got back my SA1 results and it sucks. Feeling so disappointed in myself. Despite the hardwork I try I still failed. What's worst is I failed my maths? Throughout my 9 years of education, my maths have always been A1. But I fucking got a F9 this year. I will let this be the last time and this will be my worst results. I won't let this happen again. This will be my worst results for my whole education life. I won't let history repeat itself. Did I mention that I hate losing? Yup, I hate losing but who doesn't? Everyone hate losing but now its the matter of fact of how I am going to face this problem. I will not let it destroy me. I will definitely pick myself up. Don't be too complacent. This is not the end O level will mark everything. I will make sure I will beat you hands down.

Wedding dinner

I am the VVIP today! First time sitting at the red table! Kind of fun and I went up to the stage for the yum seng ceremony! Nice experience and I was playing with Cerise like a crazy woman! I am happy to know that you guys are concern about me, I will learn to protect myself and I will stay strong cause I know that all of you are on my side. I won't fall easily and tears won't flow easily too. I am a strong girl and I can overcome all this. I won't let myself fall. I am the kind of girl that doesn't know how to express my feelings. I hide everything inside me. Sometimes I need someone who I can talk to but I don't know who should I turn to. Sometimes I need a hug so badly but I don't know who can I hug. To all that are worried about me recently, don't worry I have already overcome something that is worst than this so what is this to me. I am so able to overcome it as long as you give me time. I have the confident that I can survive through this ordeal.

Thinking too much again?

Okay school was normal but I am getting more and more tired. Tuition, speech day rehearsal, tests and midyear is near the corner and even friends too. Sometimes I wonder what am I to you? Someone that is not important or what? I am really really sick and tired of all these. When will this stop. I don't know if it's the truth or I am just paranoid. I am too tired of all this. I don't want to face all this. I am just a normal teenage going through life like anyone else but why does it seems like my life is especially hard to go through. Things have never been smooth at all. Why on earth am I suffering from all this hardship? Sometimes I hope that I can leave this damn place, sometimes I think it's fine. I don't even know what I want. I am a weird person who can't decide on what I want, who don't know how to voice out my own opinions. I also want to be someone who can say anything they like, but I just can't. I think of the consequences and do things carefully which doesn't seem like a good thing at all.